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HUMOR - Ha hA Ha

Discussion in 'Hangout' started by NAREN64, Jul 13, 2010.

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  1. Most Innocent prayer by a little girl :

    Dear God, please send some clothes for all those poor women in my brother's laptop..!
  2. Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"

    The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."

    "The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."
  3. Tony

    Tony Esperto

    Messages:
    2,049
    Kalamboli, Navi Mumbai
    Kuwait
    Grande Punto 1.2
    :evilsmile :evilsmile :evilsmile :evilsmile :uh
  4. English is a Funny Language ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    In An Office:
    TOILET OUT OF ORDER... PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW

    In A Laundromat:
    AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

    In A London Department Store:
    BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

    In An Factory:
    WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

    Outside A Secondhand Shop:
    WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

    Seen During A Conference:
    FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

    Notice In A Farmer's Field:
    THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES!
  5. Newly Married Wife :)

    Monday:
    Now home from honeymoon and settled in our new home.
    It's fun to cook for Tim. Today I made an angel food cake and the recipe said, "beat 12 eggs separately." Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do that, so I had to borrow 12 bowls to beat the eggs in. The cake turned out fine though.

    Tuesday:
    We wanted a fruit salad for supper. The recipe said, "serve without dressing." So I didn't dress. But Tim happened to bring a friend home for supper that night. They both looked so startled when I served them, I think it was the salad.

    Wednesday:
    I decided to serve rice and found a recipe which said, "wash thoroughly before steaming the rice." So I heated some water and took a bath before steaming the rice. Sounded kinda silly in the middle of the day. I can't say it improved the rice anyhow.

    Thursday:
    Today Tim asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe.
    It said, prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving." I hunted all over the place for a garden and when I got one, I tossed my salad into the bed of lettuce and stood over there for over one hour so the dog would not take it. Tim came over and asked if I felt all right.I wonder why? He must be stressed at work, I'll try to be supportive.

    Friday:
    Today I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said, "put all ingredients in a bowl and beat it." Beat it I did,to my mum's place. There must have been something wrong with the recipe, because when I came back home again, it looked the same as when I left it.

    Saturday:
    Tim went shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I'm sure I don't know how hens dress for Sunday. I never noticed back on the farm, but I found an old doll dress and it's little cute shoes. I thought the hen looked really cute. When Tim saw it, he started counting to ten. Either he was really stressed because of his work, or he wanted the chicken to dance.

    When I asked him what was wrong he started crying and shouting out "why me? why me ?"

    Hmmm....It must be his job.
  6. Bala

    Bala Esperto

    Messages:
    1,070
    Villupuram
    Binzi,very clever,you have removed the word Sardarji from the two engineering students joke,the previous joke was also very hilarious,I only wish that it was not your own true story!
  7. Viny

    Viny Esperto

    Messages:
    1,742
    :)
    Just in case you were still wondering as to why India lost the final of the 2003 world cup after playing so well in the league games, probably here lies the answer..

    The teams that qualified for the super six stage: India, Sri Lanka, Australia, New Zealand, Kenya, and Zimbabwe.

    Note there are two teams each from the continents of Asia, Australia & Africa respectively..

    The teams that have the last alphabet 'a' in their names qualified for the semifinals viz.
    Indi'a' , Australi'a' , Keny'a' & Sri Lank'a'
    The teams that have alphabets 'ia' at the last of their name qualified for the Final i.e
    Ind 'ia' & Austral'ia'
    Now,
    Kisne World Cup 'lia' Austra'lia'
    Kisne World Cup 'dia' In'dia'

    Simple hai mamu. :cool :cool
  8. Dilip_dmk

    Dilip_dmk Superiore

    Messages:
    649
    Delhi, India
    New Delhi
    Grande Punto 1.2
    Re: Girls like Red Punto

    :firey

    Arre wah !!! :wow
    Y dis is in the humor section ????? I just got to know about dis today ....

    :hit :hit :hit PS :hit :hit :hit
  9. 10 Rules For Men To Follow For A Happy Life

    It's important to have a woman who helps at home.
    It's important to have a woman who cooks from time to time.
    It's important to have a woman who keeps the house clean.
    It's important to have a woman who has a job.
    It's important to have a woman who likes you.
    It's important to have a woman who can be your very best friend.
    It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
    It's important to have a woman who you can trust, who doesn't lie to you.
    It's important to have a woman who is good in bed.
    It's very, very important that these nine women do not know each other.
  10. English is a Funny Language

    In An Office:
    TOILET OUT OF ORDER... PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW

    In A Laundromat:
    AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

    In A London Department Store:
    BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

    In An Factory:
    WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

    Outside A Secondhand Shop:
    WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

    Seen During A Conference:
    FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

    Notice In A Farmer's Field:
    THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES!
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